Eve has a habit of mixing her metaphors and committing various misnomers. She also has a habit of not understanding/mixing up popular common knowledge and phrases. She does this for many reason, mainly because she genuinely isn't familiar with much pop culture. She wouldn't be, living her life mostly isolated and completely involved in her work. She has never made a habit of having conversations with anyone but suspects, witnesses, and other cops, and she doesn't read, so metaphors wouldn't be her strongest area. Also, she enjoys frustrating people, and has admitted that she does mix her words occasionally on purpose, both to amuse and frustrate those who love her, to confuse people, and also because she says some sayings are just stupid and boring, and, more than a few times, her twist around of the saying makes more sense than the original one did. A collection of her misnomers are listed below.
Eve: "Don't climb on your golden horse with me, Roarke. Don't you even start."
Roarke: "That would be high horse, Lieutenant." -Vengeance in Death
Eve: "They had to get the name from somewhere."
Roarke: "Maybe from the Greeks."
Eve: "Greek Town isn't anywhere near that sector."
Roarke: "....The ancient Greeks, Lieutenant. In mythology, Cassandra could foretell the future, but no one believed her. She warned of death and destruction and was dismissed. Her predictions always came true."
Eve: "How do you know all this shit?"-Loyalty in Death
Peabody: "Those usual routines don't apply as much when you're Bonding."
Eve: "Bonding? How am I bonding? I'm not interested in bonding. In fact, I dislike bonding intensely."
Peabody: "No, no. Bonding. Like Bond, James Bond? You know, ult spy guy."
Eve: "God. Why me?" -Divided in Death
Peabody: "Eggshells."
Eve: "What? You want eggs?"
Peabody: "No, I meant we're going to have to walk on eggshells here. Be really careful?"
Eve: "I thought it was something like 'you can't make scrambled eggs without breaking some.'"
Peabody: "No, it's 'you can't make an omelette without breaking some eggs' but this is more like the opposite in the food-saying spectrum. Eggs have been broken but we don't want to crush the shells."
Eve: "It's a stupid saying because if the eggs are already broken, who gives a damn about the stupid shells?" -Innocent in Death
Eve: "I don't get the teddy bear thing. Aren't bears something people generally try to avoid so as to not be mauled?" -Innocent in Death
Eve: "If the arrow starts pointing at him, it'd help if I had that in my pocket."
Roarke: "Quiver. You keep arrows in a quiver." -Innocent in Death
Eve: "She ditched you for the bird in the hand. Now you're....What's a really big bird?"
Roarke: "An ostrich?"
Eve: "Yeah, but that doesn't sound right. Anyway, you're the bird in the big-ass shiny gold nest." -Innocent in Death
Eve: "You've got to stop interfering with this....thing they've [Peabody and McNab] got going on."
Roarke: "Maybe I will, when you stop seeing their relationship as some sort of bugaboo."
Eve: "Bugaboo? What the hell is that? I don't see their relationship as a bugaboo because I don't even know what that means. That's probably not even a word, and if it is, it's a really stupid word." -Reunion in Death
Morris: "Our killer knows how to color inside the lines."
Eve: "Sorry?"
Morris: "Your deprived childhood continues to fascinate me." - Imitation in Death
Roarke: "Mavis will be there ringing."
Eve: "Ringing what?"
Roarke: "Bells, I assume."
Eve: "What does that mean, anyway? Why would people come to your house wearing bells? It would just be annoying."
Roarke: "Mmm." - Origin in Death
Eve: "He'd have made millions on this."
Roarke: "Grossed."
Eve: "I'll say it's gross."
Roarke: "No, no." [It was a relief to laugh.] "Grossed income." - Origin in Death
"But I got lost as Gretel in the woods."
Eve: "Gretel who?"
"Hansel's sister? It's a fairy tale."
Eve: "Right. I knew that." - Origin in Death
Cher Reo: "We’re not just talking lawyers, we’re talking really rich lawyers with big, fat retainers and hordes of legal drones who can find a precedent in a haystack.”
Eve: "A haystack? What does that mean?"
Cher Reo: "Never mind." - Born in Death
Peabody: "She's what my granny calls a tough cookie."
Eve: "I don’t get that. If a cookie’s tough, you throw it away. She’s the type that knows how to stick.”
Peabody: "It just means....Never mind." - Born in Death
Eve: "Who the hell was Alexander Hamilton, and why was there a rest area off the turnpike named after him?" - Strangers in Death
Eve: "I figure if you've got a horn, why wouldn't you toot it, so that one never makes sense to me." - Salvation in Death
Eve: "And kills the fat cow anyway."
Roarke: "That would be fatted, and calf."
Eve: "What's the difference?" - Salvation in Death
Eve: "They’ll use the sanctity of confession because they believe it.”
Roarke: "And you don't?"
Eve: "Hell no. You cop to a crime, the person you cop to has a responsibility to report it."
Roarke: "Black and white."
Eve: "What am I supposed to see, purple?" - Salvation in Death
Eve: "Penny Soto was his athlete's heel."
Roarke: "Achilles...Do you do that on purpose? The misnomers?"
Eve: "...Maybe. Sometimes." - Salvation in Death
Eve: "I think it’d be embarrassing to be dead in the Hoochie-Coochie River.”
Roarke: "Chattahoochee."
Eve: "What's the difference?" - Promises in Death
Eve: "They’re all connected. It’s going to fall like a house of dominoes.”
Peabody: “I think that’s house of cards, maybe rows of dominoes.”
Eve: Whichever, it's coming down." - Promises in Death
Eve: "I can’t stop the nightmares, but I can handle them better now. They’re not a dance in a meadow, which I don’t get anyway. Why is dancing in a meadow with all that tall grass hiding whatever’s slinking around under it, and the bugs flying around your head such a fun deal?” - Kindred in Death
Roarke: "And when we go back, we’ll lose an hour.”
Eve: “See? It’s senseless. How can you lose an hour? Where does it go? Can someone else find it? Does it get reported to the Lost Time Division?” - Kindred in Death
Eve: "And if we’re going to use that kind of analogy, bringing the department in would be like all those cooks burning the pie or whatever it is.”
Peabody: “I think it’s spoiling the broth.”
Eve: “Who eats broth?”
Peabody: "Sick people, maybe.”
Eve: “Burning the pie makes more sense, because then nobody can eat it, sick or healthy." - Kindred in Death
Feeney: "Kid, I don’t know where I went wrong with you. You got no culture. That’s Springsteen. That’s The Boss.”
Eve: "Boss of who?”
Feeney: "Hopeless. Get out of here and send Jamie in. We’re on the clock now. And besides, he can be educated about classic music.” - Kindred in Death
Peabody: "Last year I went to a con with McNab.”
Eve: "Why would you go to a con?”
Peabody: "A game con - convention." - Fantasy in Death
"Pottery class.”
“With the thing?” [Eve made a vague outline of a wheel with her hands.] "And the gunk?" - Fantasy in Death
Eve: "The Dark Knight connection."
Roarke: What would Batman have to do with it?”
Eve: “How do you know that? How do I say ‘Dark Knight’ and you immediately click to Batman. How do you know this stuff?”
Roarke: "The question might be how do you not know. Batman’s been part of the popular culture lexicon for more than a century.” - Fantasy in Death
Eve: "You'd think there’d be more murders.”
Roarke: "Looking for a busman’s holiday?”
Eve: “I know what that means even though it doesn’t make any sense." - Indulgence in Death
"No reason to dawdle.”
Eve: "What’s a dawdle exactly? Is it more than a pause, less than procrastination?” - Indulgence in Death
Roarke: "You need more sleep.”
Eve: “Skillet, pan.”
Roarke: “What?”
Eve: "You know, the skillet says the pan’s the same deal.”
Roarke: “I believe that’s the pot calling the kettle black.”
Eve: “Whatever, kitchen stuff can’t talk anyway." - Indulgence in Death
Eve: "We’ve got bigger fish to bake.”
Peabody: "Fry. Fish to fry.”
Eve: “Jesus, why would you care how metaphorical fish is cooked?” - Indulgence in Death
Eve: "There's the cricket mallet—”
Roarke: "Bat. It’s a cricket bat.”
Eve: “It doesn’t look like a bat. Or mallet either, but it doesn’t matter." - Indulgence in Death
Eve: It’s Major Ketchup in the bathroom with the laser scalpel.”
Roarke: “Hmm. Obviously we were meant for each other as I can interpret that as you meaning something more like Colonel Mustard in the conservatory with the candlestick.”
Eve: "Whatever. It’s that game, who was it...McNab or Peabody said something about that game sometime back.”
Roarke: “Clue.”
Eve: "You always know this crap." - Indulgence in Death
Eve: "Why would somebody bring food when they’re coming to your place to eat?”
Peabody: “It’s a social nicety.”
Eve: "There are too many of those, and who started them?" - Indulgence in Death
Eve: "So far they’re ahead on the trail, but they’re leaving a lot of cookie crumbs to follow.”
Peabody: “That’s bread crumbs.”
Eve: “I’d rather have a cookie." - Indulgence in Death
Eve: "Picking out the pin in a pretty massive haystack—”
Roarke: “That would be needle.”
Eve: "Whatever." - Treachery in Death
Eve: Peabody may find more, something specific, the hair on the camel’s back—”
Roarke: "Straw. It’s the straw that broke the camel’s back.”
Eve: “What would a camel do with a straw? Whatever." -Treachery in Death
Roarke: "Jealousy again.”
Eve: “The green-skinned monster.”
[Roarke started to correct her, then shrugged.]
“Well, in this case.” - Chaos in Death
Eve: "I don’t think real coffee’s going to make her rise up and bite your throat.”
Morris: "Brains. Zombies eat brains.”
Eve: “Okay, that’s just sick.”
Morris: "Well , they are zombies, after all." - Celebrity in Death
Eve: "She’s the ‘spread the chickens in many coops’ type.”
Peabody: “I think that’s eggs and baskets.”
Eve: “Chickens, eggs. Same thing.” - Celebrity in Death
Eve: "I figure, yeah. It’s the old ‘hell’s got nothing on a woman dumped.’”
Roarke: “Or words to that effect." - Celebrity in Death
Eve: "She's threatening to throw pliers in it.”
Roarke: “That’s wrench, but just the same.” - Celebrity in Death
Eve: "People get pissed when they get passed over, or somebody else gets the plum on top.”
Roarke: Cherry. The cherry’s on top. The plum’s in the pie.”
Eve: “Sometimes you want the plum, the cherry, and the whole damn pie." - Delusion in Death
Eve: "Business is dog eat cat, right?”
Roarke: "Dog.”
Eve: “I said dog.”
Roarke: “Dog eat dog.”
Eve: “That’s just stupid. Dogs eat cats. Everybody knows that.”
Roarke: “I stand corrected. Business is dog eat cat.”
Eve: "Like I said." - Delusion in Death
Eve: "And that rise would be a feather in her pocket, right?”
Roarke: "Cap. Feather in her cap." - Delusion in Death
Roarke: "Add the world was going to hell in a handbasket.”
Eve: "What does that mean? What’s a handbasket? If it’s a basket, you need your hands to carry it, so it’s a given.”
Roarke: "It might be a bushel basket. You’d need your arms.”
Eve: "How much is a bushel?”
Roarke: "Four pecks.”
Eve: "Now you’re messing with me. Peck’s what chickens do.”
Roarke: "I stand corrected.” - Delusion in Death
Eve: "He took the bait and ran with it.”
Teasdale: "Once you take the bait, you’re hooked. Running becomes problematic.”
Eve: "Whatever." - Delusion in Death
Eve: "And you can count on the fact this guy’s going to bite off more than he can swallow.”
Teasdale: "Chew."
Eve: “You need to swallow after you chew, right?” - Delusion in Death
Eve: If this was a random kill, I’m a monkey’s cousin.”
Peabody: "Uncle.”
Eve: "What?”
Peabody: "It’s a monkey’s uncle, and before you ask, no, I don’t know why because, really, on the evolutionary train, cousin’s about right.” - Calculated in Death
Roarke: "Studs, subtle again, and classic, with the pop of the carnelian that picks up the color of the jacket.”
Eve: "I thought carnelian changed colors.”
Roarke: “Very funny.” - Calculated in Death
Peabody: "Waste not, want not."
Eve: "Sounds true." - Calculated in Death
Eve: "Alexander gets his share—the elephant’s share—”
Roarke: "Lion’s share, as you perfectly well know.”
Eve: "Elephants are the biggest, and he takes the biggest.”
Roarke: "Your logic is . . . unarguable.”
Eve: “See?" - Calculated in Death
Eve: "Maybe he took his muscle to the toolshed.”
Peabody: "The toolshed? For the hammer?”
Eve: “No, you know. You go to the toolshed to get your ass whipped.”
Peabody: “You do? Oh, oh, you mean woodshed.”
Eve: “Why does wood need a shed?” - Calculated in Death
Eve: She figures I’m the fly in his lotion.”
Roarke: "Ointment.”
Eve: "Same thing." - Calculated in Death
Eve: "Though modesty will prevent me from playing my own fiddle—”
Roarke: "Tooting your own horn.”
Eve: "What’s the difference? They both make noise.”
Roarke: "I stand, if not corrected, forced to agree.” - Calculated in Death
Eve: "What's that saying? The more, the crazier?"
Roarke: "I believe its merrier, but either way." - Thankless in Death
Morris: This is considerably sharper than a serpent’s tooth.”
Eve: "What serpent?”
Morris: “Shakespeare’s.”
Eve: “Oh.” - Thankless in Death
Carmichael: Yeah, well, he won’t be passing Go.”
Eve: "Go where?”
Carmichael: You know. Go. Monopoly. The game.”
Eve: "Oh." - Thankless in Death
Eve: "It's a tough break, but you wear what you sew. If you know how to sew anyway.”
Roarke: “That’s reap what you sow, as in harvest what you plant.”
Eve: “If you go around sewing something, you’re going to have to wear it. So?” - Thankless in Death
Eve: "World's his clam."
Roarke: "Oyster." - Thankless in Death
Eve: "What do you know about a toy—what is it—jumbalaya?”
Peabody: "Jamboree."
Eve: "Yeah, that.” - Taken in Death
Eve: "Food for thought. And what the hell does that even mean? Why would you serve food for thoughts, and what kind of food? If you serve spinach, do you get healthy thoughts? If it’s ice cream and candy, is it fun thoughts? Why do we say stupid sayings?” - Concealed in Death
Eve: "Idioms for idiots." - Concealed in Death
Eve: "Why are they reindeer? What kind of name is that?"
"They need the reins for Santa to navigate the sleigh."
Eve: "Right." - Concealed in Death
Eve: The decorating, the memory street—”
Roarke: “Lane. Memory lane.”
Eve: "Street, road, lane, they all lead somewhere." - Concealed in Death
Eve: "And why is it called quicksand anyway? In the vids, people and unfortunate animals just sink slowly.” - Concealed in Death
Eve: "Some people only see the right now, and end up killing the golden duck.”
Peabody: "Goose. The golden goose.”
Eve: “Duck, goose, what’s the difference? They’re both weird-looking birds.”
Peabody: "Aw, did you ever play Duck, Duck, Goose?”
Eve: "Did I ever play with ducks and goose—geese? Why the hell would I?”
Peabody: "No, the kids' game." - Festive in Death
Peabody: "She makes the most incredible mincemeat pie.”
Eve: "I thought free-agers didn’t eat meat.”
Peabody: "Mostly we don’t. Mincemeat isn’t meat.”
Eve: “Then why do they call it meat?”
Peabody: "....I don’t know." - Festive in Death
Roarke: “It’s the old catching more flies with sugar than vinegar.”
Eve: “Why would anyone want to catch flies? What you want is to make them go the hell away.”
Roarke: "That’s a point, and now another classic adage bites the dust.” - Festive in Death
Eve: "Is that the fly, sugar, vinegar deal?”
Peabody: "Yeah, I guess it is.”
Eve: "I still don’t get it." - Festive in Death
Eve: "What was that called? A bob? Why was it called a bob? What kind of name was bob for hair?" - Festive in Death
Eve: "I don’t get why people tell you to enjoy your day, much less machines. If they don’t know you, what the hell do they care?”
Peabody: "No man is an island?”
Eve: “Why would anybody say that? An island’s a scoop of land floating around on a bunch of water.”
Peabody: "I think it means—never mind." - Festive in Death
Eve: "Well, three’s a crowd anyway. Except it’s really not. One too many people in a given circumstance doesn’t make a crowd. Why are sayings so stupid?” -Festive in Death
Eve: "Still, he's getting stones in his Christmas stocking.”
Roarke: “That’s coal.”
Eve: "Open this. I figured it would be the . . ." [She threw her hands in the air, made a whooshing sound.] “What is it?”
Roarke: “The explosion.”
“No, no, when the guy who—” [With loosely fisted hands she waved her arms in the air.] And the musicians all—”
Roarke: "The crescendo?....I adore you." - Festive in Death
Eve: "The message is a herring.”
Peabody: "A red herring?”
Eve: Why are they red, and what the hell does that expression really mean anyway? It’s annoying.” - Obsession in Death
Nadine: "Dead?”
Eve: “As in doornail. Whatever the hell that is.” - Obsession in Death
Eve: "Somebody she knew hired the hit, is using me as that herring thing.”
Roarke: "Red herring.”
Eve: “Yeah, yeah, I got it’s red. I don’t know why it’s red. A purple herring makes more sense...or less, which is kind of the point. But I got it’s red.”
Roarke: "I love you.”
Eve: "I got that, too." - Obsession in Death
Eve: "Problem is, it’ll be like looking for the crazy needle in a stack of needles. And nobody say ‘haystack' because that’s just stupid." - Obsession in Death
Eve: What color do you call that suit?”
Morris: “Carnelian.”
Eve: “Isn’t that the animal who changes colors?”
Morris: “That’s a chameleon.”
Eve: "Okay. Well, I like the color so it’s good it doesn’t change on you.” - Obsession in Death
Eve: "Maybe a smart cop could figure out how to send us chasing the wild turkey.”
Peabody: It’s goose, the wild goose. I’m pretty sure wild turkey is some kind of whiskey.”
Eve: “Goose, turkey, both weird looking birds." - Obsession in Death
Roarke: That’s good thinking.”
Eve: Yeah, he was wearing the thinking hat today.”
Roarke: “Cap.”
Eve: “What’s the difference?”
Roarke: "Idiom.”
Eve: "Schmidiom." - Obsession in Death